Englands World Cup 2014 Squad

This picture was printed in the Daily Mail in 2007 and predicts England's world cup squad for the 2014 World Cup. If ever you needed proof that the Daily Mail are full of horse shit, then look no further. What a baffling array of woefully poor football players this team consists of. I will give them the benefit of the doubt on Theo Walcott who will definitely be in the squad in Brazil, but is by no means guaranteed to start

This picture is pretty self-explanatory, but I do have a couple of questions to ask the author of this article. Firstly WHERE IS WAYNE ROONEY?! Surely, having seen the rise of Wayne Rooney since his debut, even a retarded cocker spaniel could see that at 28, he would be 'quite important' to England. I also struggle to see how Michael Johnson could ever be conceived as being better than Steven Gerrard and why Ashley Cole isn't still in there.

2007 is a year that a lot of people in football will want to regret. Portsmouth will no doubt regret signing John Utaka. Liverpool will regret signing Andriy Voronin and Man Utd were prolific and definitely regret signing Anderson, Nani and Owen Hargreaves. I suspect, someone at the Daily Mail wish they'd pulled the plug on this as well/

World Cup 2014 Draw

It has just been announced that England will play Uruguay, Costa Rica and Italy in the Group stages of next years World Cup. All over my Twitter feed and Facebook timeline are people saying: 

"England might as well book the plane home now"

Frankly, these people have seen the names Uruguay and Italy and proverbially shit themselves. England are more than capable of topping that group. Whether they will or not is frankly another matter but we'll wait and see on that one. I want a bit of "this is our year" positivity. 

Firstly, I think Italy present a far bigger threat that Uruguay to England, despite all this talk of "OMFG South American teams!!!". Think back to the Euro's last year, we lost to Italy in a shite game where neither team did very much. In horrendously hot and humid Manaus at 2am GMT, noone is going to fancy that one. Italy will be just as annoyed with the group as us, and we certainly shouldn't fear them. 

As for the Uruguayans, did noone watch the Confederations Cup in Brazil not long ago? Uruguay were utter shite, and I mean that politely. Look down their teamsheet and you'll see 3 stand-out names; Forlan, Cavani & a certain Luis Suarez. Forlan is well past it and I personally think Edinson Cavani is grossly over-rated. As for Suarez, all we need is Stevie G to run through him in the last Liverpool training session before he goes. If not, chances are he will be suspended for biting a black pensioner in Toxteth anyway. 

Then when we come away from Group D top with 7 points, we'll have a favourable draw in the second round with Ivory Coast probably being the bookies favourite. Like I said, a bit of English positivity please.

I actually rather like the draw. Group G will be great to watch but for me Group B wins it. The long awaited rematch of the horribly ugly 2010 World Cup Final will be a great watch. Something tells me Howard Webb might not get that gig.

Fuck that haters. Come on England

Cristiano Ronaldo dos Santos Aveiro

Since 2008, I have rated Cristiano Ronaldo as the best player in world football. I will explain why later on. However, he is my idol for different reasons for that. I will explain that too.

Ronaldo has publicly thanked his childhood friend Albert Fantrau for his success. If you don't know the story, allow me to fill you in. When Sporting Lisbon scouts came to watch Ronaldo's team play, they said that the player who scored the most goals will be accepted into the academy. The team won 3-0 with Ronaldo scoring 2 and Fantrau scoring the other. At 2-0, Fantrau went 1-on-1 with the keeper, rounded him and instead of tapping the ball into an empty net, passed to Ronaldo, who scored and therefore was taken to the Sporting academy. After the match, Fantrau told Ronaldo "You're better than me." and thats why he passed. If you were to go to Albert Fantrau's address now, you'll find a gorgeous house, nice car and a very rich, unemployed man. All gifts from Cristiano. This is why I admire Ronaldo so much.

On the pitch, Ronaldo is the single most complete footballer in the world. Physically, his speed, power and endurance can be matched by noone. He is a threat with his left and right foot, as well as being an talisman in the air, no defence in the world can contain him. He revolutionised the way free kicks are struck and can make the ball do things that seem physically improbable. In recent years, his goalscoring record speaks for itself, 206 goals in 2014 games for Madrid is simply indescribable. Ronaldo has proved himself in different countries, with different teams, coaches and managers. Where his rivals struggle to make an impact at International level, he single-handedly drags Portugal to tournament after tournament. This year alone, Ronaldo has outscored every Premier League on his own, and as of today has scored 8 goals in this seasons Champions League.

If Cristiano Ronaldo does not win the Ballon D'Or this year, then I will lose what little (very little) respect I have for FiFA.

My 3 Favourite Cristiano Ronaldo Goals

3) Man Utd v Portsmouth
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smnOWsLmXI8
2) Real Madrid v Sevilla
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mtrdg1qMMF0
1) Porto v Man Utd
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JLkI7AUFo0

6 Real Life Wonderkids

It is always risky to predict the future stars in football. Injuries can hamper progression or they can simply go the same way as Francis Jeffers or Freddie Adu. However, from the extensive football I watch and follow, I have found 6 players that should be right at the top of world football in 5 to 10 years time. I have tried to choose some of the less obvious names. It doesn't take a genius to work out that Neymar and Gareth Bale with still be 'quite' good in 2018. Fingers crossed on this one!


Stephan El Sharaawy (21)
Ludicrous hair for a player with ludicrous potential, 21 year old El Sharaawy has broken into the AC Milan set up in the last 2 or 3 years. A speedy winger who possesses great skill and an eye for goal, it is hardly surprising that he has adready made it into the Italian national set up, although he tends to be used from the bench at this stage. Rumour has it that Milan are allowing El Sharaawy to leave the San Siro in the near future, and Premier League clubs such as Liverpool & Chelsea are keen. Don't go there Stephan, you're better than Liverpool and won't get played at Chelsea!


Álvaro Morata (21)
21 year old Álvaro Morata has the potential to be something really special at Real Madrid. In his tenure, José Mourinho chose to leave Morata in Real Madrid's 'Castilla' (Reserves), a decision that proved unpopular in the Spanish media. On his first full appearance for the senior team, Morata scored after 60 seconds of coming on, securing a 2-1 away win - talk about an introduction! His goalscoring record is exceptional... 45 goals in 83 appearances for Real Madrid Castilla and 11 goals in 9 games for Spain U21s. This guy has the potential to be something really special. At present he is used off the bench as a more than capable replacement for Karim Benzema, but I think he's good to start from time to time. Come on Ancelotti, take the chance on him. When Morata is the next Raul, you heard it here first!



Gerard Deulofeu (19)
You have probably heard of 19 year old Gerard Deulofeu because of his current loan spell with Roberto Martinez at Everton from Barcelona B. I would not be surprised if he is kept

at the Nou Camp long term though. Barcelona have a rich history of integrating youth team players into their first team set up, usually as back up. Look at the likes of Christian Tello and Pedro. However, should he not be kept at Barca long term, he could be a hell of a catch for other clubs. In the 2012/13 season, Deulofeu scored 18 goals in 33 appearances for Barca B, not bad considering he is an out-and-out winger. I want to see him play more for Everton, and so most probably to Barcelona. I believe he's been loaned to them to toughen him up before he comes back to become a big hit in Spain.



Zakaria Bakkali (17)
Bakkali is next on the conveyor belt of young Belgian wonderkids. Currently plying his

trade at PSV in Holland, the 17 year old is most famous for becoming the youngest Eredivisie player of all-time to score a hat-trick, at the age of 17 years and 196 days. Having scored 7 goals in 9 games for Belgium U17s, Bakkali has recently been promoted to the Belgium U21s. In this list, Bakkali is the youngest, has little first team experience and hasn't proved himself yet. But I have a feeling he will.



Raphaël Varane (20)
Having played 28 times already for the Real Madrid first team, Varane is already showing

his class and can only get better and better. I am not sure why Carlo Ancelotti chooses Pepe over Varane in honesty because I believe in the long run, he could turn out being the best central defender in the world. Standing at 6'3'', but still possessing a decent turn of pace, no striker will fancy going up against him. His height also makes him a goal threat, proven when he scored a towering header in El Clásico last year. Irritatingly, he's French. 



Julien Draxler (20)
Draxler is considered as a well- rounded attacking midfielder with massive future talent,

who has the ability to be a game-changer in any given moment. He has already played for the German national team and he’s viewed as the future of the squad. He has already been linked with Chelsea, Bayern and Real Madrid in recent years, not bad all before your 21st birthday. Ze Germans speak of him very highly indeed, with good reason. Looking at the young german midfielders, to be mentioned as the future star is some accolade. I hope for his sake that he doesn't jump off the Schalke ship too early, as a move to a big club too soon could stifle his progression if he isn't a regular starter. Just what the world needs, another German wonderkid... 

Racism in Football

Having not posted on this blog for a while, I was watching the CSKA Moscow v Man City game and searching for a new topic when sky announce that Yaya Toure is the subject of monkey chants from the home supporters. This sent my mind into a spasm of depression and rage at a whole manner of different parties.

Firstly this latest incident comes from a set of fans that support CSKA Moscow, a Russian team whose first choice strikers are pictured below. I typed the word "laughable" to describe that fact, but it isn't laughable at all. To be honest, I genuinely am lost for words.

Seydou Doumbia & Ahmed Musa - CSKA Moscow players

This comes in a country that is notorious for racism. Below are just three incidents that I've thought of off the top of my head. There are likely to be many more that barely even make the headlines.

1) Roberto Carlos - In an away match for Anzhi Machachkala at Krylia Sovetov , Roberto Carlos received a pass from the goalkeeper and was about to pass it when a banana was thrown on to the pitch. He walked off the pitch immediately, indicating that this was the 2nd time this kind of incident had happened. 


2) Chris Samba - In a similar incident, Chris Samba had a banana thrown at him playing away at Zenit St Petersburg.

3) Zenit Fans Letter - When Zenit first announced the signing of Hulk, the Zenit fans wrote an open letter to the club, in which it said, "We're not racists but we see the absence of black players at Zenit as an important tradition,". (See here for full story - http://ind.pn/UDbOmD)

As you probably know, Russia have been elected to hold the 2018 FIFA World Cup (At England's expense I might add!). This can be added to the already mammoth list of baffling decisions and stupid choices that FIFA make. As much as I would like to, I won't be talking about that decision here. Instead, I will slaughter UEFA's policy for punishment for this kind of offence.

It is likely that CSKA Moscow will be fined a few thousand pounds for this, the media will call it an outrage, nothing more will be done and we'll have another racism issue in Russia in about 2 months time. What should happen is that CSKA Moscow should be fined heavily, and they should be kicked out banned from the UEFA competitions for a couple of years. I am willing to bet all that I own that Spurs will be fined more than CSKA for the flair incident earlier this week. UEFA are just as bad as the fans for failing to address the issues in European football.

As if to insult us all, during half-time in the Man Utd game later on, a 'No To Racism' advert, endorsed by the worlds best footballers is shown. I wanted to punch the screen. 

UEFA, you're a joke. Russia, you're a joke. Racism, no joke

Not quite all European football...

Read about todays abuse at the expense of Yaya Toure here - http://www.theguardian.com/football/2013/oct/23/manchester-city-yaya-toure-racist-chanting

Are Sunderland Making The Same Mistake Twice

It has broken today that Gus Poyet is set to be unveiled as the new Sunderland manager,

after the recent sacking of the ever-amusing Paolo Di Canio. Compare the CVs of the two men and you find a lot of similarities. You could call both foreign hot heads who, whilst playing in good premier league teams in the 90s, have no elite experience in management.

Make no mistake, Poyet has done a great job at Brighton. He took them from a mediocre League One team to a Championship team with playoff aspirations, transforming their playing style in the process. Poyet won 86 of his 194 games as Brighton manager, leading them from League One to the Championship play-offs last season, where they lost out to eventual winners Crystal Palace.

Sunderland chairman Ellis Short heavily hinted that Di Canio's appointment last season was a short term fix and keeping them in the Premier League was his only task. But what next for Sunderland Football Club? Their squad contains players too good to be battling relegation this season. The likes of Emanuele Giaccherini, Adam Johnson and Steven Fletcher are simply too good to be battling relegation over and over again. 

For the record, I do not think that Sunderland will be relegated this season, and Poyet can look to build a new Sunderland with increasing amounts of foreign flair and vigour.

The Qatar 2022 FIFA World Cup Shambles

Sepp Blatter has today reiterated that the World Cup in 2022 will definitely take place in Qatar, despite the debate surrounding the countries summer temperatures and recent reports of 'slave-like' working conditions. FIFA have also announced that they are setting up a 'task-force' who will look into a winter-held tournament for the first time ever and make a decision in about 12 months.

Qatar 'won' the right to hold the 2022 world cup in December 2010, almost 3 years ago. I CAN believe that its taken  FIFA 3 years to find Qatar on a map, but can't believe that noone thought that it might be hot in the Middle-East in summer. 

I am a firm believer that moving the Qatar World Cup to

winter is a poor idea. When talking about this, my friend Luke made a point that I completely agree with. When the issue first arose and a winter tournament was considered, Qatar should have had to rebid for the World Cup against Japan, South Korea, USA & Australia with their bid centred around being held in winter. Then, if they won the bid, they could go ahead and mess with the world's football calender. The fact of the matter is, noone voted for a winter World Cup in 2022.

Qatar's Crazy Stadia Designs

I believe that the USA should have won the right to hold the World Cup, although obviously I don't know the specifics of the bid. Russia won the bid over the UK because FIFA thought that the tournament could invigorate football in Russia. By that same logic, 'soccer' would see a huge surge in popularity across the pond if all the world stars came calling.

Saying that, who is surprised to see FIFA, with Sepp Blatter at the helm, make questionable choices. The man is an idiot.

"What Am I doing?" - Sepp Blatter